Not in the zone

It's been a bit hard to post since we decided to start TTC again, mainly because I just have other things on my mind. I have been more inclined to read up on pregnancy and frequenting parenting forums that putting too much thought into my body image, or yours! :O)



However since we got AUSTAR television recently I have been addicted to the lifestyle channel & Discovery home and health and have found myself watching a few questionable programs that got me thinking.



Firstly TALES FROM FAT CAMP. I know it sounds horrendous just from the title doesn't it? To their credit I'm sure the folks at 'fat camp' otherwise known as CAMP SHANE mean well. They just take what is commonly accepted to be true about obesity & diet and use it to try and get some chubby kids into a more acceptable shape or in their words 'healthier'.



What strikes me as ridiculous though is that there are kids that go back every summer, very few of which look like they do if camp shane does what it is meant to do IYKWIM? seriously if camp Shane worked so well surely there would be no need to return summer after summer, more often than not fatter then when they came last time?



Of course much of the blame is placed upon the kiddies themselves........



It concerned me the other night when a young girl was brought to the medic cabin with lightheadedness/dehydration?/exhaustionm? and offered a small chocolate to raise her blood sugar? which of course she declined because she didn't want to go over her calorie allowance. Seriously she refused to even take a bite, the consellor even told her to suck it and then spit it out!!



The other show that turns my stomach a little is BIG MEDICINE focusing on gastric bypass surgery, a kind of before and after show. I have no problems with folks using surgery when they are severely obese and their health effects outweight the risks of surgery-if that's what they really want to do. The particular episode that I found disturbing was a young girl who had had the surgery and was left with a gross amount of lose skin that she eventually came in to have removed. Again, all very well and good if that is what a person wants.



What I found disturbing was the continual references to this young womans appearance, how pretty she was and how much prettier she was going to be when they created her new body for her.The scenes post surgery really turned my stomach-this girl in her underwear being poked and prodded while two old men stood around touching and feeling and making grunts of approval, admiring their handiwork in some kind of frankenstein fashion. It really freaked me out as they pointed out her flat stomach and perky lifted breasts all the while making these weird little noises and telling her how pretty and sexy she was and making references to how her personal life was going to change.

It was innapropriateand gross and it sickened me that these men ad created their own barbie like interpretation of their own ideal woman. Ick.


Apart from all the dodgy tv I have been watching all is business as usual around here. I have been feeling a little 'off' this week, very tired, queasy and miserable which I would mostly chalk up to some kind of viral thing, or PMS? and trying not to suspect a BFP so as not to be disappointed............

Loves it!!

I'm quite sure the 'what not to wear' chickies would be sneered at a little in the more feminist oriented body acceptance circles but I just love them. I love how they can help women look and feel great regardless of their shape or size. Having said that though I am yet to see a really obese woman participate in their show so perhaps that is one limitation.....

Anyways I love them and I love this new book they have out-I have to have it! Check it out in a little more detail here http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=488236&in_page_id=1879

Turns out I am somwehere between an hourglass

and a cello......................

and I am quite happy with that. I think I'm more of a cello but my bust is more in proportion to my bottom half and my waist slightly more defined when I am wearing the correct bra, but not as tiny in the waist as a traditional hourglass.

Looking at the shape of the cello I think it is really quite beautiful and womanly, I love the smooth curves and I need to appreciate the curves of my own body in the same way.

Anyways I hope to own this book before the week is through.......

On a totally different note we are once again contemplating baby number two........hayd brought the subject up this time & I am a bubble of excitement & nervousness all at once!

Free Rice

This is my new favourite blog http://kateharding.net/


This is my new favourite game , found through new favourite blog http://www.freerice.com/

This was playing on the radio this morning and I was simply joyous to hear a little voice pipe up in the background, it was grace singing along happily. Thankyou Mika!

City Chic

The (big) City Chic site is currently under development and it looks like they will soon have online shopping...Huzzah! My bottom half is considerably larger than my top and I always find a generous pants fit there but there are only two queensland stores, none of which are close to me :O(

Please don't think that I forget there are all shapes and sizes who read my blogs because I know there are, it's just that I never hear any of my smaller friends complaining about not being able to find nice clothes in their size which is something I hear again and again from ladies who have more curves.

http://www.citychic.com.au/# Oops! (forgot to add the link ;)

Beyond Dieting

I am slowly building up a library of IE, body acceptance articles etc, that I can turn to when the going gets tough and I feel tempted to start finding fault with my body or feel pressured to diet. So that's the main reason I am adding so many links. I find even just one little reading a day helps me to stay grounded and focused.

http://www.beyonddieting.com/ten.html

I wanted to ask you all...what makes you guys feel most tempted to jump on the dieting bandwagon? When do you feel at your most vulnerable? For me it's when I bump into people who knew me when I was slimmer, I feel as if I am under pressure to meet their expectations of how I am supposed to look, the pressure to change my body to meet their perceptions.

Yes, I am THAT lazy!

http://www.bodypositive.com/

ED Recovery

Anyone taking the first steps towards ED recovery living in Queensland might want to start here..
http://www.eda.org.au/home.htm

Not laughing

If this woman wasn't so fucking dangerous she would be a big fucking joke!
http://www.monicagrenfell.co.uk/index.html

Podcast

Have a listen to this great podcast!
http://www.blogher.com/podcast-letter-my-body-jessica-weiner
Some of it made me very teary, (ok I had a little bawl) thinking about how much I hated my body when I was younger, how I tried to starve it to comply with society's 'ideal'....what I would give now to have that beautiful body back. Not because it was overly skinny or perfect, but because it was mine, before I gave it away. Before I gave my power away.

It just breaks my heart.

Absent

Lately as I dig through the archives of some fantastic bloggers that I have only just found recently, I think to myself where have I been? How could I have missed things like http://kateharding.net/2007/11/27/the-fantasy-of-being-thin/ and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8dm5VpYGH4 ???

I think somehow I lost my focus for a while on what was important to me, or how terribly important IE is to me. I think the size of my bum took up too many of my precious thoughts for a while and probably too much of my time. I don't know how it happened :O(

I think I was absent for a while, but now I am present.

BED

I thought this post was really great, you should watch the clip toohttp://the-f-word.org/blog/index.php/2008/02/05/morgan-rocks-m-j-show-show-addresses-binge-eating-disorder/-informative for those who know nothing about BED. What I liked most about the clip & the post is that they voiced something that I have been thinking for years-whilst anorexia sufferers are often on the end of sympathy or concern (because the physical symptoms of their disorder suggest illness and a sort of frailty), sufferers of BED are more likely to be at the brunt of jokes or outright hatred because the symptoms of their disorder (excess body weight , binge eating etc) are deemed distasteful (to put it VERY mildly) in our culture. The one other time I did mention it on my blog I received my first and last hateful comment telling me to get off my fat girl high horse.

So I'm glad somebody else came out and said it, and right there on TV too, jebus I can't imagine how their inbox overflowed!. Though a stupid comparison-anorexia is definately the more culturally 'acceptable' ED.

True love

Lazy Lisa Links...
http://www.harrietbrown.com/Spread-the-love.pdf